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Quick question: Has anyone ever been or tired the Medifast Diet? does it work? Looking forward for any answer. 2nd question I got is.. For 5 months I worked Medifast well enough to lose 46 lbs. But the old ways are slipping back in. I cannot do this alone. I'm turning back to my Higher Power, God as I understand God, to get me through this and beyond. |
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Hmm... I need to find out myself. I don't know what is the answer. I'll do some investigation and get back to you if I got an anything. You should email the people at Medifast as they probably could answer your Medifast question..
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Thank you, Lin, for posting these. Your comment following the bump was very helpful to me too..
Lizbeth.. |
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Years ago, when I was doing family of origin work for codependence and nicotine addiction, I used Melody Beattie's writings, which helped immensely. I am turning to them again for help in taking care of myself by staying on MF, as closely as possible, as it is written. This for me constitutes abstinence. Abstinence is the goal. Then life can play out against a clean, sober, healthful background, where serenity and freedom and joy just naturally happen..
Today, Jan. 11, 2010, I am learning that when others behave badly, I can detach and realize it is not MY issue. It is THEIRS. Melody Beattie says in "The Language of Letting Go""We can separate another's issues from our issues, and let the person experience the consequences of his or her own behavior, including guilt. We can trust ourselves to know when our boundaries are being violated.". I am learning that my husband's relatives are not my responsibility. I am not required to "fix" their problems, and I don't have to feel guilty for realizing this truth.. The affirmation for today is: ". Today, I will let go of my big and little guilty feelings. Light and love are on my side.". In other words, I didn't break 'em so I can't fix 'em.. All I can do is be the best healthiest me I can be.. Cheers,. Lin.. |
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OA & Medifast is a winning (& losing) combo. lol.
Cheers,. Lin.. |
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Well, I give it to Him, then take it back. Someday I may learn....
But not yet.... Lin.. |
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Wonderful thread! I'm glad I found this. I have tried to fix people in vain. I need to work on my thinking habits as well as my weight..
"Today, I will let go of my big and little guilty feelings. Light and love are on my side.". Love this thought:. Looking forward to a happy healthy me!. ~S~.. |
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Lin, I'm so glad to have found this thread. If it wasn't here, I was going to start one. I, too, am an OA member and am using Medifast as my meal plan. I think that the two together will be a great combo - Medifast is a black & white food plan which is what I need. OA deals with the mess inside my head and helps me understand that I cannot do this alone, that God can, and I need to let him. Do you attend meetings? I go to a meeting on Saturday mornings and I call into the phone meetings from time to time. They're great when I need a mid-week boost...
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Great thread!! I will be coming by frequently...have read many books by oa and love it......
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God, grant me the.
Serenity. To accept the things I cannot change, the. Courage. To change the things I can, and the. Wisdom. To know the difference.. It's a simple concept but so very difficult to put into action on a consistent basis.. I need to remember to pray for willingness every day to do God's will and to ask for the grace to stay on my food plan. When I do this simple thing in the morning, it makes such a difference in my day... |
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One of my meditation books this morning was talking about self-respect and self-esteem and where we get that from. For today, I choose to get my self-esteem by taking care of myself and choosing to eat on plan. Every morning I read my books and I ask God for his protection from compulsive eating and ask for the willingness to stay on my food plan. I envision His protective arms around me caring for me for the day and protecting me. I don't know why certain foods have a power over me. I can allow them to rule me or I can allow God to be my protection to keep my desire for them at bay. Just for today, I choose God's protection...
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Hi all, if people like this thread I'll stop by every day, since this is a one day at a time program, not once in a while... lol I'm on the 60's board most days..
Mary, I don't attend meetings. The only one I tried in Atlanta allowed anorexics and bulemics, and I just can't sit there and listen to people whine about keeping enough food down to fill out their size 2's. I looked online for a meeting but found none open. I would do an online meeting if there was one open. I can't commit to starting a new one because of my new marriage, new home, new hometown.... I'm working with Melody Beattie materials, working on detaching from food as a source of pleasure. I really like the idea that Medifast constitutes abstinence.. Staying on Medifast is like surrendering to the process, instead of trying to outsmart the system.. Cheers,. Lin.. |
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Lin, if you are interested in telephone meetings I can give you the information. It's a long distance call so you either need unlimited long distance or cell phone minutes. I've gotten on them several times and they're very good..
I'd like to get discussion going on here if you're game. The more support the better... |
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Mary, I am definitely game for keeping a conversation going here, and it probably wouldn't hurt to do telephone meetings as well. Should I find one online or would it be better if you give me the number. I have unlimited ld..
Today has been wonderful. I am hungry, probably on the verge of a weight drop, but today has not been about food. I'm hanging in, letting the process work.. Hope you have had a good day.. Lin.. |
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OMgosh! I'm am so happy someone started an OA thread. I went to oa years ago and then stopped..
Hi my name is Pam and I am a compulsive overeater. I lost 90 pounds last year on Medifast and gained it back along with 10 more. I temporarily changed what went in my mouth but not my reactions to life.. I no longer have a book but will try to get one. All the meetings I used to go to no longer meet. I would be interested in the phone call meetings.. |
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Hi, Pam! Welcome. lol.
I too lost 100 pounds and kept it off for 9 years!!!! Wouldn'tchathink... after 9 years I would have learned something, and I did. Just not everything and that's where I made mistake. I thought I could handle food... WRONG! Throw in a few real life tragedies on top of every day life and bingo - gained back 95 lbs of the 100. So, Hi, my name is Lin and i'm an emotional eater.. Step 1 - I admit that I am powerless over people, places, things, and food, and that life without these principles becomes unmanageable. (I work on my codependency issues as much as my food issues.). Hope everyone is abstinent, just for today.. Lin.. |
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Good morning!.
Tigger I would love the number to get in on an OA call/meeting.. Lin your so right! We can never start to think that our relationship with food is like everyone elses. Some folk actuallt forget to eat or eat so little because it doesn't mean anything to them, I am NOT one of those people, Food is always on my mind whether it's a craving or just watching the clock to know when I can have my next Medifast food. In the past working the OA 12 steps freed me from that. Now I can't even remember why I stopped going to the meetings.. For today it is one meal at a time.. Hugs,.. |
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When I get home tonight, I will post the phone number for the phone meetings. There is a 6:45am and 6:45pm meeting and a 6:45am Pacific Time meeting as well. These do readings out of the Big Book and the For Today and Voices of Recovery books. I have the phone number and the PIN numbers to get onto the calls. They last an hour and are very good. I know there are other phone meetings too and will get you what information I have on those too..
I also think there is info on the OA website but I have the information so it's just as easy for me to post it.. For today, I am keeping to my meal plan. I've been finding it helpful to log my food online in the morning for the whole day and then uncheck the foods I haven't eaten yet. As I go through the day, I check off as I eat each meal. It gives me accountability and takes away the thinking process of what I should eat. I cannot think about food at the time, I must plan in advance as well as weighing and measuring my lean & green. If I don't, I set myself up for compulsive thinking and behavior.. Nice to see you all on this thread... I was happy to find other OA'ers/12 steppers here on MF.. Have a great day and I'll post the phone numbers later on... |
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Hi,.
My name is Susan and would love to join the group. Without going on and on, in the last week there have been so many things (God) pointing me in this direction. I would love to join the phone group,too. Thanks for posting.. Blessings,. Susan.. |
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Hi Susan, so glad to meet you. The OA phone meetings are a real blessing because you can tap in wherever you are..
Every morning, I say the 3rd step prayer:. God, today is a new day for me and with you it can be a day of abstinence. With You I can handle anything. I ask for your protection in case some time during the day my desire to eat compulsively becomes stronger than my desire to abstain. I ask for your protection against anyone and anything that will interfere with my abstinence. I know that I am powerless over food and that my life can become unmanageable again. Please guide me through another day of abstinence. God I need You... |
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Thanks so much Mary. I know I need my God to help me overcome my compulsive eating. I love the 12 step program and believe anyone and everyone would benefit from the journey..
SusanYeah!!! So glad you're here too.. Big hugs,.. |
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Susan, Pam, Mary, & yours truly...hey! we have our own meeting! Cool!.
Looking forward to getting those numbers, Mary.. Well, it being the weekend, I have to drive three hours, abstaining from whipping into all the fast food places along the way, then get to where my husband is, cook for him, abstaining from BLT's (bites, licks, tastes), then abstain from denial, laziness, procrastination, and ingratitude as I move through the weekend until he goes back to work, all while staying on plan. And I weigh Sunday morning. But I'm worried about the Ritz crackers.. How the heck did something like a Ritz cracker gain such power in my life??!! Yet I know they are in that cabinet down there because he likes them. I'm confronting the enemy now so it won't slip up on me. This is Step 5.: We admit to God, ourselves, and another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.. I confess to lusting after Ritz crackers.. Lin. Lin.. |
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Thank you for helping others who can't admit to others and sometimes thereselves that they have a real problem. I can still remember back 40 years ago hearing my mother getting sick after every meal and at first questioning it in my own head - never dare voicing anything out loud - and after a while just thinking she was sick. Now I know what was happening and realized I am not the only in the family following her footsteps. I need this site again thank you...
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Ididit, you are very welcome here, and it is true, not everyone shares our dysfunction!.
Well gang, as you can see, I changed my ticker and avatar. And I'm posting this here as well as Super 60's because for me this is a biggie. (And no, the Ritz crackers did not lure me). .. I made an executive decision this morning before I got on that scale. I decided that I was not going to let that number, whatever it was, dictate my emotions, my mood, my feelings about life or myself, or any other part of my existence.. So, with that firmly in mind, I got on the blasted thing and discovered that I'd only lost one pound in about a month. Yes, I'm disappointed, but not defeated. My life is just too good otherwise to be brought down by a number on a scale. You can tell that by looking at My Page.. I had already decided to change my goal because I know I will be unhappy for sure with my skin if I lose too much. I've done a lot of damage gaining and losing and spending too much time in the sun. I already am getting so I won't look in the mirror because of it. But my husband acts like he thinks I'm the most beautiful, sexiest thing on the planet, and that's what counts. Furthermore, I FEEL sexy and beautiful and no little digital monster is going to take that away from me.. Am I giving up? Of course not. I'm excited about life and the contributions I can make to it. I may even start writing again. Regardless, I am On Plan to the best of my ability, which, for me, constitutes Abstinence, which equals living a clean and sober life of service to others, as my Higher Power (Jesus Christ) directs.. Hope you'll forgive this soapbox. I needed to get this out.. Love to all,. Lin.. |
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Lin, good for you for not giving in to the Ritz crackers. And more importantly for not letting the scale dictate your mood. That little devil can make us higher than a kite or lower than the Grand Canyon but only if we let it...
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Here are the numbers for the OA phone meetings:.
Daily:. 6:45am Eastern Time. 6:45pm Eastern Time. 712-432-3900 Pin 4285115#. Press *6 to mute and *7 to unmute. 2pm Sunday - Relapse & Recovery at the same phone number and pin number. There is also a 6:45am Pacific Time phone meeting:. 712-432-3900. Pin 836731#.. |
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Mary, I did the 6:45 p.m. meeting. Thank you so much. I felt so comforted by hearing those familiar words, the steps, the readings, the prayers. This is great. Thanks,.
Lin.. |
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I'm so glad! You're very welcome. Always happy to spread the word...
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Morning All,.
Just wanted to say I've done 3 phone meetings in the last 13 hours, and I'm back in touch with the extent of my disease, which goes so far beyond food. Perfectionism, criticism of self and others, these particularly have hit home. I urge everyone to follow Mary's lead. Go to oa.org and print out a phone list.. Also just subscribed to Lifeline. I am awed by how far OA has grown since I last participated. Overjoyed is a better word. I know that no matter how perfectly I do MF, I have not begun to address the core issues until I work the steps in surrender to my Higher Power.. Thanks again, Mary.. Have a great day, everybody!. Lin.. |
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I went to my Saturday morning meeting as usual. I always hear something that I need to hear because the people in those rooms (on the phone, etc) understand me. And Lin, I hear you on the "extent" of the disease because when I get complacent or think I have it beat is when it creeps up and bashes me in the head. I have to know that I will.
Never. Be cured, but with willingness, work, and prayer the disease can be kept at bay.. I had a slip over the weekend and ate some things I shouldn't have, but I shook it off and didn't beat myself up over it. I just went forward with my day as if it didn't happen and stuck to my program the rest of the day and the next day. It may show up in my loss this week, but if I hadn't shaken it off, I would have had much worse results. It's about winning the battles one day at a time. The war is way too big for me to deal with... |
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Yeah, if we get crazy about "doing it perfectly" it just keeps the insanity going. You might read my post today on the Super 60's thread, about going to dinner with my husband. I definitely ate things some people would say I SHOULDN'T, but learning to live my life in a healthy rational saner way is important to me, now that I actually HAVE a life! lol.
Food is only about 50% of my problem. My reactions to life are the other 50%.. Thank God I don't have to deal with any of it. Just accept. He will do the rest.. Lin.. |
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Hi: This thread/forum caught my attention. Thank you all for your comments - I enjoyed reading your insights and perspectives..
Take care.. I Havent Arrived Exactly Where I Want To Be, But By The Grace of God Im Not Where I Once Was.. |
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Thanks, JoJo. You reached your goal! How wonderful!.
Sounds like we have a favorite female evangelist in common. I love that expression about not being where we once were.. As we say, Keep Coming Back! Share your insights with us.. Lin.. |
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Lin, it's funny you talk about perfection. Yesterday's "For Today" meditation was about perfectionism being a form of obsession. We wait to fix the hanging wallpaper because we want to find the "perfect" replacement and in the meantime allow ourselves to live with the current stuff hanging from the walls. I am a huge procrastinator and when I read the last line, it said that any step I take today towards accomplishing a project adds to my recovery (paraphrased). That one definitely hit home for me. I have so many large projects at home that I have not done because looking at the whole job is so daunting.
Sounds like my weight loss journey, doesn't it? If I look at the whole picture, I become discouraged, but if I take one day and commit to being on plan just for today, it's not so overwhelming.. Have a great day everyone!.. |
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Hey y'all! I love this thread!.
I am completely co-dependent w/parents and have eaten and spent my way through my problems for years.. I am trying so hard now-I realize I can't carb haze my way through issues. I physically feel things now that I have never felt-like a fist in my chest over anxious situations. I think I always ate my way through it.. I have been OP since the week before Thanksgiving and I have not gone off OP except for a handful of beers when we were out with friends (not all at once-not an alcoholic too). I really have to watch social situations like this though.. I really believe abstinence is the only way-food is different for me. My friend asked the other day how a diet w/o fruit could be good for you. And I had to think about it and I told her the next day that my body reacts differently to the carbs and I can't eat them now on the plan. If my body and mind were different, I could probably handle a diet with fruit and whole grains, etc.. STAY OPwe are worth it!. Laura Lee.. |
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Hi Laura Lee, welcome to our thread..
I can so relate to the "carb haze" you spoke about. I think the reason I like Medifast is you give up refined sugars and carbs completely which are my "drugs of choice". But you're right, once we're clean there's no blocking the feelings. One of the ladies in program talks about a God box and she actually writes down problems/feelings/etc on a piece of paper and physically puts them in a shoe box. I've been thinking about this and wondering if I should try it... |
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Great thread. I feel at home! Ms Perfection and the best little girl in the world were my mottoes and it is hard to keep focused, but 1 day at a time and realizing I'm imperfect in an imperfect world are constant reminders I need. I'll visit here often...
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Morning all,.
I'm just checking in while I'm waiting for the phone meetings to start. Loving those... a lot!. Saw my therapist yesterday. We talked about how OA 12 Steps are smacking me in the face about how it isn't about food, yet abstinence is necessary to keep from burying the feelings. Afterward I stopped by Walmart and bought two food scales, one for home and another for here at my mother's house, where I happen to be for a few days. I want to tighten up on the weighing and measuring because I'm bad about kidding myself about portions.. I'm looking forward to receiving my new order... it is two cases each of choc. & vanilla RTD's (ready to drink) because I want to make it simpler to do the 5&1. I have been doing the recipes, which are terrific, except all that just keeps my mind on the food. If I battle with food, food wins. I do have one box of the new brownies coming. The thing about RTD's is they contain NONE of the allergens. It is just a personal experiment to see if I feel "cleaner" - Then for the L&G I can go to town with the veggies, which I really enjoy - Medifast has taught me the value of chicken broth. lol. BBL,. Lin.. |
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Hey y'all.
Lin-I do not do Medifast recipes either. Although, I am going to order the PB2 and try the reese cup recipe when I can. But there is a limit to how much I want to doctor it all up. I roast broccoli everyday for my veggie too-I kind of find what I like and then just go for it! But I was like that in my carb haze too-I would eat popcorn every single day.. It is hard to think about issues deeply now-I hate to feel it all. I have so much guilt and regret. I run and listen to Christian music LOUD when I do. I heard yesterday-. If you don't forgive yourself of the guilt then how can you help anyone else?. HOPe everyone stays OP today-. Laura Lee.. |
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Lin, it's funny because with my order this month I kept it pretty simple, mostly shakes, drinks, and bars. They're the easiest for me. I ordered one of the brownies, too, and am also wondering if they will set up cravings. I'll try them and see. Hearing you talk about the phone meetings is reminding me that I should get on them during the week, too. I'll have to see what I can do with my schedule..
Laura, I use 2 TBSP of PB2 in my shake in the morning with lots of ice in the blender and it makes it really thick. I rarely get hungry before the three hours when I eat my next Medifast meal. I like your quote about forgiving yourself of the guilt. That's a hard one. I can forgive most other people but I'm so hard on myself. And not having food to fall back on is making me feel all kinds of things I would rather just numb out over. I have been drinking a LOT of water... |
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Gems from the phone meetings:.
"Do not give up before the miracle happens.". "Share it or wear it". "Once a cucumber becomes a pickle, it can't go back to being a cucumber." Love this because it means if we have pickled ourselves with insane behavior around food, we have to deal with ourselves as we are, beginning with acceptance of ourselves as we are today. Then we have to become willing to allow HP to transform the insanity into something useful.. Our ability to stay abstinent (in our case, remain On Medifast Plan) depends on our spiritual condition.. I am getting so much help from these phone meetings, I took the cell phone to the grocery store and walked around listening to the 8:30 Speaker meeting while I shopped. I confess I am doing what I always do - overdoing it. I overdo EVERYTHING - even listening to meetings. But I'm feeling so focused on getting the principles back into my life as a way of life, and to reclaim the promises of neutrality in my life, where food is concerned, I'm going to keep listening for awhile.. Everybody have a blessed, abstinent day.. Lin.. |
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Mary, I can see in some of my early Medifast posts that the more I stayed OP, the madder at the whole world I got. It passed..
Lin.. |
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I'm not necessarily mad, I'm just feeling uncomfortable about certain things. I have had a lot of changes this past year; I went back to OA, I got engaged, my fiance moved in six months ago, we're planning our wedding in September, etc, etc. So I'm feeling anxious and nervous about some things, happy about others, sad about others, and Im trying to go through all this without picking up the food and it's tough..
On a bright note, I was thinking about my wedding dress, which I bought the Saturday before last, and it fits at my weight now. Whatever I lose between now and the wedding, the dress will be altered. I got it at an incredibly great price at the Alfred Angelo Outlet so the alterations are well worth it. The pressure of fitting into a dress was driving me crazy. Now that I know the dress fits and I don't have a deadline for losing weight, I feel so much better about taking this one day at a time without the wedding like this big looming date by which I need to lose X number of pounds. I don't know about you all, but I don't do well with being pressured to lose weight.. By the way, Lin, I love the "share it or wear it." I hadn't heard that one before... |
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Lin.
I took up your suggestion on the 60's Group postings and just got through reading this one from top to bottom. I too will b checking in from time to time to see if a good fit. I'm not familiar with the names, etc., many of you refer to but I do like your motivation and your walk with God on this journey. However, I don't even know what OA stands for?. Esther.. |
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Esther-it is Overeater's Anonymous. I have not been a member of OA but I did do a modified 12 step plan for my co-dependency, i.e. why I am crazy!!!.
Anyway, the principals are the same whatever your drug of choice (spending, eating, drinking, etc) you are not facing your problems if you are hiding behind your problem(s). The only way through is the Lord.. I have had an interesting day-a friend from early childhood has contacted meshe is very, very broken. Opened my eyes.. Laura Lee.. |
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Mary-congratulations on your wedding. I envy you-I wish I could do it all again! Not the husband-the wedding!!!.
Laura Lee.. |
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Morning all,.
Mary, that's exciting about your wedding dress. I watch Say Yes to the Dress all the time. You are very wise to get that pressure off yourself.. Laura Lee, I too have used PB2 and really like it, but it seems to put my mind back on food. I'm trying to work the program so that food is not an issue. I used the 12 Steps through my divorce (CoDA) Codependents Anonymous meetings and books. Also used the program to quit smoking (NicA) Nicotine Anonymous. I seem to respond to the program well to keep me grounded.. I have been saturating myself with phone meetings. At first I was feeling self-indulgent, then I realized I am blessed to have the time to listen. I put the phone on speaker and carry it around with me. I do not talk yet. It is not necessary.. The phone meeting list is available (again) at. Www.oa.org. .. I definitely feel I'm getting the help I need to be 100% abstinent on MF.. Hope everyone has a great OP day,. Lin.. |
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This was emailed to me today. I've seen it before but it struck a chord with me and I thought I would post it here..
Dancing With God. When I meditated on the word Guidance,. I kept seeing "dance" at the end of the word.. I remember reading that doing God's will is a lot like dancing.. When two people try to lead, nothing feels right... The movement doesn't flow with the music,. And everything is quite uncomfortable and jerky.. When one person realizes that, and lets the other lead,. Both bodies begin to flow with the music.. One gives gentle cues, perhaps with a nudge to the back. Or by pressing Lightly in one direction or another.. It's as if two become one body, moving beautifully.. The dance takes surrender, willingness,. And attentiveness from one person. And gentle guidance and skill from the other.. My eyes drew back to the word Guidance.. When I saw "G": I thought of God, followed by "u" and "i".. "God, "u" and "i" dance.". God, you, and I dance.. As I lowered my head, I became willing to trust. That I would get guidance about my life.. Once again, I became willing to let God lead.. My prayer for you today is that God's blessings. And mercies are upon you on this day and everyday.. May you abide in God, as God abides in you.. Dance together with God, trusting God to lead. And to guide you through each season of your life.. Prayer is powerful and there are no conditions. So let's continue to pray for one another... |
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Wow! Mary, that's powerful. Hope you don't mind if I send it to my loved ones. I sent my granddaughter a youtube of "I Hope You Dance" for Valentine's..
Thanks so much,. Lin.. |
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Thank you Mary for posting this. It so aporppos to where I am right now..
Hello ladies. I have been meaning to come to this thread since Lin first posted it. I am a long ago OA member & did very well with it, but I also got arrogant & thought I could do it myself. YOU GUESSED!!!! I couldn't.. I read every single post & just want to say hello for now & I will come back on Friday with something to add to the mix. Right now, is not good for me.. ODAAT OP ladies. (I didn't see any gents on the thread).. |
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Thanks Mary!!!.
I need some inspiration. Sometimes I get scared I can't do this and that I will have put in all this effort and failbut really I have to give it up and let God guide me. I can't worry.. HOPe all is well. Laura Lee.. |
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Blanche, Welcome! What does ODAAT mean? Educate us, please..
Thanks for sharing! lol. Lin.. |
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I thinks it's One Day At A Time..
I have no gems of wisdom this morning, just checking in to say hello to everyone. Have a great day and I'll check back later!.. |
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Lin, Mary is right. 12 steppers & MFERS live by ODAAT, ONE DAY AT A TIME...
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Hey Ladies-sometimes I feel like I am living One Minute at a Timewhen I am hungry or anxious!.
I am having a good day today though-got my exercise in and made some returns to put more cash back in my pocket!. Laura Lee.. |
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Uh...duh...sometimes I totally overlook the obvious... lol.
Laura Lee, I need to follow your lead... my cash knows only one direction.... Food is good today.. Everybody have a OP ODAAT day!. Lin.. |
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Good afternoon everyone. I ended up coming in to work for a couple of hours today doing some reports for a meeting on Monday morning. I wanted to drop in and say hello. I went to my meeting this morning and spoke with someone about being my OA sponsor. I will call her Monday and get the ball rolling..
Have a great day!.. |
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Just wanted to say thank you for starting this thread...I am looking into the resources you listed....please keep this going.......
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Hey y'all!.
I am having a good day too. It is date night with my husband. Maybe he will notice I lost weight today? He never says anything.. Got my exercise in and bought a pair of needed (do not overspend, do not overspend) running shorts for when it finally warms up here in ATL. One day we will all be bundled up and then next it is flip flops and shorts.. Today I enjoyed my run-I prayed for other people while I was running and I found it refreshing and it kept me going to not focus on myself.. Have a great OP weekend-. Laura Lee.. |
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Ok, Kraftie. We will be here, God willing and all that....
Laura Lee, I just got it that you are in Atlanta. I'm boing back and forth between Atlanta (Mableton) and Salem, SC, trying to sell my mother's house, and waiting for Bill to retire in July. You are so right about the weather, and about getting our minds off ourselves. You can put me on that list of yours anytime.. Mary, I called a person I heard sharing because I was so impressed with her. She isn't sponsoring but she's going to call me in the morning and maybe we will be talking once a week. I am liking the idea of dignity of choice. I'm still not sure what 90 days meand in terms of meeting strategy. I know some meetings we need 90 days of absence to share, but sometimes I think they have their own program going. Same for HOW. Maybe it's a character defect. If it is I'm sure my HP will point it out lol...when He's good and ready.. Bill just got home.. Bye for now,. Lin.. |
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Hi everybody :-).
I used to attend OA meetings a lot a few years back, and then just fell away from them. I've been struggling with food big time the past couple of years again...seems like a huge demon inside sometimes wanting to control my life.. I've maintained some weight loss, but really want to lose the rest of it, and learn to be more at peace with food. Seeing this thread reminded me of so many wonderful OA moments I experienced back when.... I know a couple of people who have done Medifast with great success. But I know I am more obsessed with food than they are. I think incorporating OA while doing Medifast is a great idea. Thanks for the reminder Lin in starting this thread.. I am starting Medifast tomorrow, and there is also a meeting nearby tomorrow evening...I'm going to attend. I need help from my HP big time. I have given up so many times on different diets...given up on myself to many times.. Lin: I love that you wrote this in a earlier post :"Do not give up before the miracle happens." I don't want to give up on myself this time. I deserve to feel the best that I can.. Will pop in tomorrow. Have a good night everyone... |
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The "God Box"....I've heard of that before, but I've never done it. I think I really need to do it this time...what a concept...turning it all over to my HP...
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Hope you had a fun date night.
I'm sure you husband just feels that you look beautiful...remember, men are more "dense" than we are.. |
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This is good to read this. I also have used OA in the past and have kind of forgotten about it. I think it will be beneficial to use in conjunction with MFusing OP as abstinence..
Good idea, I'll try it. I have a meeting close by on Wed. night.. Thanks.. |
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I've been an OAer for many years. What I love about the 12 Steps is that they teach us how to live life honestly. They don't approach obesity as a food issue...it's treated from a whole person perspective. Overeating is a symptom of inner turmoil & the Steps help us get that turmoil sorted out. OA advocates abstinence which is different for everyone. YOUR version of abstinence may not be MY version of abstinence but all versions are fine.
I joined Medifast back in 2008 & I used the 5/1 to stay abstinent & I continued following the 12 Steps to keep my life in order. I never took a sponsor, I worked the Steps in my own way. Now that I've been in maintenance for the past 14 months, I've found MY version of abstinence & that's what I stick to every day: a written plan that works for me. I do ask my HP for strength when I feel weak or tempted to binge & throw it all away for a plate of food. I think that combining OA with Medifast is a SUPERB idea, it's worked wonders for me. These food issues can be bigger than WE are & that's where the HP & the Steps play a vital part in ongoing recovery. The 12 Steps give us a way to deal with every single issue life ever throws at us. It's a guide for LIFE, not a diet. Different groups have different philosophies but should ALL be 12 Step based. You may have to look around to find a group that suits YOU. Again, find one that works for YOU. An old OA saying is this: take what you like from the meetings & leave the rest. Similar to these boards....LOL.. Just thoughts I'd throw my two cents into the discussion here.. Hugs to all,. Chris.. |
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Welcome curvybeauty, lhorton & Chris. Hope you will keep coming back and share your struggle or your experience, strength & hope. Or both!.
I am finding listening to phone meetings very helpful. I printed the list and just phone in and listen, one after the other, as I'm able. It's like a 12 Steps crash course. I find myself going, "Oh, yeah, that's why I went back to the food... I didn't trust God enough to get me through without eating." I didn't accept myself as I was, and I thought it was about losing weight. It isn't. Letting my HP restore me to sanity.. I'm wondering about a sponsor... don't have to decide today.. This week coming up is critical. It is the 2nd anniversary of my son's death, so I am praying to be able to trust God enough not to have to eat because of the feelings this brings up. Even saying that out loud, I know the help I need is there for me.. Well, lots of other stressful things going on in the house. Life goes on.... Love to all,. Lin.. |
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Fantastic Chris!! Thanks for sharing how well OA worked Medifast for you. Congratulations on reaching goal and maintaining..
Good morning Lin and everyone. I'm on day one today. I look orward to going to an OA meeting later today... |
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Lin: So sorry re you son's death....that's tough. Sending big hugs...
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I'm wondering about a sponsor... don't have to decide today..
This week coming up is critical. It is the 2nd anniversary of my son's death, so I am praying to be able to trust God enough not to have to eat because of the feelings this brings up. Even saying that out loud, I know the help I need is there for me.. Sorry, I'm not quite sure how to copy/paste the portion of this quote...LOL, so bear with me.. Lin, I'm so sorry about your son. What a difficult time this is for you. As a mother myself, I just can't imagine the pain you must be suffering. Food can be so soothing, I know, but then we feel all the guilt & see the weight gain & UGH, it's such a vicious cycle. Food will always be the drug of choice for people like us. Try to remember how food solves nothing, it only exacerbates an already horrible situation. When you 'let go & let God' it can be very liberating. When I have a particularly difficult day where I want to eat everything in sight, I ask God to help me & I surrender my powerlessness over food to Him. I feel calmer when I do that, when I remember that God WILL take this burden off of my shoulders IF I ask for it. One day at a time really DOES apply to recovery. We can't expect to fix ourselves in a flash. It is a process & a journey.. Taking on an OA sponsor can be a tricky thing. Some of them are way over the top with their approach to a program that needs to be kept simple. They overcomplicate it, they inject their own brand of 'tough love' into the Steps. We know about 'tough love'...sometimes it's just 'tough' with no 'love'. The process of going thru the 12 Steps can be very, very intense & emotional. If you want to take a sponsor, that person needs to be kind & gentle. I never took a sponsor because I felt I couldn't share that intimate journey with anyone else, I had to do it on my own. Now, some would say that defeats the purpose of the 12 Steps. I say, who cares? I work MY program MY way & I've gotten tremendous serenity out of it. Period. Find what works for YOU & go from there. The way I see it, there is no 'right' or 'wrong' way to work the Steps. If you freak out over one of them, stop. Sit back, relax & give yourself time to absorb & process your feelings. There is no timetable for all this. We evolve in due time, with God's help & the help of all of our fellow OAers.. Big hugs to all. Chris.. |
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I'm posting 2 blurbs from my OA book, For Today. They are relevant to all of us. I am so glad to see this thread, I can't tell you. I used to post OA based blogs & very few people seemed interested in the ideas. I always wished some MFers would be willing to embrace the OA concepts as part of their recovery so this thread makes my heart happy. Thank you..
A single arrow is easily broken, but not ten in a bundle.. Japanese Proverb. Compulsive overeating is largely a solitary pursuit. When I was out there eating, I scorned the idea that I needed people. I ate alone & thought I was ruggedly independent. In truth, I was pathetically deluded & seriously ill.. The relief of finding OA can hardly be described. Here is strength that does not threaten or demand or pat me on the head. In the instant I made myself part of that strength, I became whole.. For Today: The quality of my recovery & my life depends on something I can find only at OA meetings; contact with other recovering compulsive overeaters.. All things are possible until they are proved impossible - and even the impossible may only be so, as of now. Pearl S. Buck. If I set my sights short with the thought that weight loss is enough, I may never live life to it's fullest, enjoying it's pleasures and gifts. I was not meant to live in spiritual poverty. God's gifts are mine for the taking, to be kept only by sharing them with others.. If today it seems impossible to be free of my most deeply-rooted faults, I accept that reality only for today. Tomorrow takes care of itself, and there is every reason to believe all things are possible. Have I not received gifts I once thought were impossible?. For Today: If abstinence with peace of mind & physical wellbeing is possible, can anything be impossible?. Hugs. Chris.. |
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Chris: Thanks for the above posts. I so agree re finding a sponsor. It's challenging to find a great fit. I think your approach is very good...still going through the steps, and it works for you....and has brought you peace of mind. Fantastic..
Re when you want to copy and paste what someone has said in a post....all you have to do is go to the bottom right hand corner of that post and click on "quote". Then you can write your response. :-).. |
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Thanks Curvy....what about if I want to quote only a portion of what the poster has said? Can that be done?..
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You are welcome.
Then you click on quote...and just delete whatever paragraph or lines that you don't want in there. but make sure you don't delete the "quotes" at the beginning or end of that person's message. Does that make sense??.. |
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Hi Chris: I'm trying it with your previous post, and deleted your first paragraph...to make sure it works :-)..
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Yup, it worked :-) So that's all you have to do. Let me know if you're still not clear on it...
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Hello Everyone I am really trying to get a grip on my weight and issue and so I started reading this thread and see a few of you I already know here and that is great!! I have heard of OA but have never used it and it sounds like something I can benefit from so tell me how I get started and maybe suggest some reading materials I can look at?.
Lin you touched my heart when I read that you lost your son because I have also lost my son in 1995 he was 18 months old and it has been a big issue in my whole adult life being that I was 25 when he died and I will be 40 in 2 weeks I know after he died my weight soared out of control so I understand that feeling of loss and it cuts like a knife everyday!. Hey Chris and Tigger I am glad to see you gals here because you both inspire me with your wisdom!.. |
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Lin you touched my heart when I read that you lost your son because I have also lost my son in 1995 he was 18 months old and it has been a big issue in my whole adult life being that I was 25 when he died and I will be 40 in 2 weeks I know after he died my weight soared out of control so I understand that feeling of loss and it cuts like a knife everyday!.
Lisa, I'm so sorry for the loss of your son. Such pain to endure for so many, it's no wonder we've turned to food to anesthetize ourselves.. Go to OA.org for lots of information about the organization. You can buy reading materials right there on the site too. I highly recommend For Today which is a little book with inspirational thoughts & ideas for every day of the year. I love love LOVE that book, it is my bible. You can sign up for online OA meetings or you can find a local group meeting in your area. 12 Step work is crucial for many of us who face compulsive eating disorders. When we deal with ourselves & our issues is when we get the over-eating under control. Admitting powerlessness over food is very, very liberating. Realizing that God can & will take that burden from us is a huge relief. We start to treat food & LIFE differently in time. We stop trying to control everything & everybody & realize what we can & should let go of. We can STOP dieting & learn to live the abstinent lifestyle once & for all, one day at a time.. Curvy, thank you for your help with the quotes...I'm trying your suggestion here with this post & I hope it turns out...LOL.. What a great discussion this is, I LOVE it!. Hugs. Chris.. |
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I used Lisa's post as a Quote but it didn't come thru that way...I hit the blue Quote button & everything! Electronically challenged here.....LOL..
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Chris: no girl...you are not electronically challenged :-) You are just deleting part of the "quote" parenthesis when you are deleting the first paragraph....that's why you are not getting it to show the quote in the blue area. Just try again....you'll see, it works :-)..
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I just wanted to do this to make sure again that it's working properly...to show Chris.
And hi to you Lisa. Blessings and hugs to you to on losing your son also....even years ago. I can't imagine the loss you feel everyday.. |
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Lin and Lisa my heart goes out to both of you. Lin I will be praying for you during this difficult week. Hang in there. Your son would be so proud of you..
I love this group....I am going to go to my first meeting this week. I am really nervous is that crazy? I guess it is because I don't know what to expect. It also means that I am admitting to total strangers that I am a food addict.. Susan.. |
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Thanks Curvy...let me try this again. I'm lucky I can plug the electric toothbrush into the wall & have it work!.
Joesgirl, I hear you about being nervous. It's natural when we don't know what to expect from a meeting. And again, they are all different so if you don't like this meeting, find another. It's easier to admit a food addiction to total strangers than it is to tell our loved ones I think. You will be shocked at the reception you get! You should get the feeling that you've come home when you share yourself with the group. If you don't, you're at the wrong meeting. Good luck to you & let us know how it turns out, ok?. Hugs. Chris.. |
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Yay...you did it...I knew you would!!.
Hey ladies...I didn't have the courage to start today. I said I would...but I didn't. I guess I'm scared. Scared of failing and falling again. Scared to not eat my favorite comfort foods. Scared to turn it over to my HP. That's it for now, just needed to say it... |
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Abby, tomorrow is a brand new day! I had my MFin food in house for ONE YEAR before I was mentally ready to tackle the beast. When I WAS ready though, watch out! LOL. You'll know when the time is right. In the meanwhile, keep the faith..
Hugs. Chris.. |
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Thanks Chris for the kind words :-) I will be going to a meeting in two hours, so I'm sure that will help to get my mindset ready...
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Evening Y'all,.
I started Medifast last week and have been looking through the boards to see where I belong so to speak. I saw this thread and new immediatley this was for me.. I have been sober going on 18 years so I do know the 12 step program and am so grateful for my soberiety. I retired from teaching school here in Texas two years ago at 55 due to my parents declining health. Since then my mom passed away last July and my dad took to the bed and drank himself into the nursing home. The last 3 years I have been"stuffing" at every moment I can and not really dealing with the stress. Having looked and tried many, many programs I came across Medifast and feel like it will give me the control I need over food. Applying the 12 steps only makes sense as I am coming to grips with I will never be able to eat as in the past and be healthy.. To the ladies that lost children that is beyond my understanding.............so very sad and tragic.. I look forward to following everyone's progress and will check in daily to see how folks are doing.. Gena.. |
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Hi Gena & welcome to MF! Combining Medifast with the 12 Steps of OA is a great idea, that's what I've been doing for the past 20 months. I used the 5/1 to get abstinent & I reached goal in 29 weeks. I use my maintenance plan these days to STAY abstinent & so far, it's working quite well. When I signed up for the 5/1, this was to be my LAST diet. I've been thru the wringer over the years with the maintenance portion. This time, I'm using the OA guidelines to keep me on track.
I know you will have great success with this program. Sit back, relax & watch the miracle unfold. All YOU have to do is to commit yourself to staying on plan (OP). Then you can let go & let God do the rest! How exciting!. Hugs. Chris.. |
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What a thrill to see this thread take off. Welcome to Gena and everyone new. I'll get everyone's name soon. I too looked after sick parents and that'll really put it on us, won't it. Didn't it....yep. I think my dress for Mama's funeral was a 3x tent, end of June.
Lisa I am so sorry for your loss. Thanks for your understanding about what that does to one's relationship with food, if that's what it can be called.. Thanks to all of your for your kindness but let me assure you I did not mention this to get sympathy (well... not. Only. To get sympathy...) I seriously believe in prayer and I believe someone with an eating disorder can pray for another one more effectively. I have a terrific support system so I do not stuff my feelings about this, nor do I try to hide them. But I totally trust God to get me through this anniversary, as He did the first one. He will do for me what I cannot do for myself.. Abby, I hope your first meeting is everything you want it to be. I have spent literally hours and hours on the phone, listening to phone meetings this week. I put the house phone on speaker and carried it around with me. I listened on the cell phone in the grocery store - nobody noticed I was not talking - just listening - who pays attention anyway. But the extra reinforcement has been wonderful.. Hubby is on his way back to work so I will be alone in the house all week, the way I like it right now.. Chris, I'm glad you said what you did about sponsors. I had one when I was quitting smoking, but it didn't work for CoDA. I think sponsors work better when the addiction can simply be stopped. An alcoholic does not have to learn to drink responsibly, right Gena? It's a different dynamic. And now that I have all of you I don't feel so alone with my 12 Steps. I'm not much of a goose stepper, but I also know I'm perfectly capable of being dishonest and trying to beat the system. If we need to start a new thread monthly, like the 60's, let's vote the group conscious. What do you all think?. Lin. Cheers,. Lin.. |
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Yes Lin, learning to eat responsibly is quite different than giving up drugs or alcohol. Truthfully, food has been THE biggest issue in my life. I feel like I am capable of ANYTHING but....food has a way of bringing me to my knees every single time. To be able to share this journey with like-minded people has been so terrific. I'm particularly thrilled to see this OA/MF thread because I think we can all benefit from the combined programs..
We are ALL capable of being dishonest & trying to beat the system! This disease is cunning, baffling & most of all: POWERFUL. We CAN do it together! I have days now in maintenance where I really struggle. I sometimes wonder if I can keep the weight off...or if it will return again like it has so many times in the past. But with OA & people like you to help me, I KNOW I can do it! I feel so relieved right now, like I can breathe again.. Let's keep this thread going, or create new ones, or whatever...let's just KEEP it going. I have virtually NO experience with these threads...I've always stuck to blogging & chat, so I'm a newcomer. But I'm eager to learn! LOL.. Hugs. Chris.. |
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Lin you are so right on the drinking................You either sober up or you drink. Eating is such a complex issue as we have to do it, but with some guidelines or we become taken over by food. I know in being sober you stay that way by giving it away which is what this thread is all about except with food. Chris, it is so important for us to hear about struggle with maintance since we all hope to be there and go through it. It is very encouraging to see someone maintain as you have. I remember my first 12 step meeting not believing someone could not drink for a month....................now I know it is possible.
I feel such a peace about the program!. Gena.. |
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Yes, food & alcohol are two different things. I always drank too much wine & I gave that up when I started Medifast on June 11, 2008. At first, it feels like HOW CAN I LIVE WITHOUT MY WINE? Then the need diminishes & the desire evaporates. That's not to say I wouldn't like a glass of wine once in awhile. But I know I'm not a 'once-in-awhile' kind of gal. With booze, it's all or nothing.
That is a much trickier balance. The 5/1 taught me to eat 6 small meals a day, at regular intervals. It was food withdrawal. My cravings went away & the program got easier to follow as the days progressed. Maintenance is a horse of another color because those blasted CHOICES come back into play. I eat 2-3 packets a day, Greek strained plain yoghurt for lunch, a L&G dinner & air popped popcorn, nuts or an apple for my evening snack. That may seem extreme, but that's what it TAKES for me to stay the course. It's when I veer off of that plan I get in trouble. The sliver of birthday cake for DH's birthday, the bite of dessert at a restaurant. I will never be a 'normal eater' just like I will never be a moderate drinker but I have times where I delude myself into thinking otherwise. I know that, intellectually, but sometimes I test it. Normally, I get right back into my daily routine. But then I start thinking about what's in the pantry...the Girl Scout cookies, the pretzels, whatever, & I know I'm walking on thin ice. That 'all or nothing' mindset can easily come BACK with regard to food if I'm not careful. So far for the past 14 months, I've eaten NO meals that weren't L&G which I'm proud of. When the snack monster likes to rear his ugly head. If I stick to my plan, I'm fine. I take it one day at a time, literally, and I know that if I veer off track a bit, I get right back ON track right away. I just worry sometimes that maybe I'll veer off track & STAY off track. That's when I need to work the Steps. BS leads back to obesity. Only honesty & truth keep me on track.. Hugs. Chris.. |
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Hey y'all!.
We had a busy weekend so I did not get to post!. My dh and I went to the concert and we had a blast. I fit really well in the seat and had room to spare. I need to savor that and remind myself that feeling comfortable in situations like that is better than eating crap.. I totally have to have the abstinence approach and keep everything very basic like Chris said. That was the problem with weight watchers-I would always try to manipulate the diet and points to eat the bad foods that were a drug for me. Food is a drug for me and it is different for me than for other people around me.. I am so sorry for the deaths in your all's lives-I have events that I have anniversaries of and it is very difficult. I will not eat my way through it though. I sit on the couch and just feel the pain. It has been so, so hard. If it take 5 cups of tea to get through it I do it until I can go run.. I would love to go to OA but I don't know if I can find the time. I have 3 young ones and an evening away is hard. I might try to find some of the books at the library. I know that I need God to get me through this and I don't want to go back to they way I was before. I am so afraid of maintenance.. Hang in there girls-STAY OP!!!. Going to the Y and hitting that elliptical HARD!. Laura Lee.. |
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Morning all,.
Chris, I am surprised that you have not been using the threads. I've read your blogs and have been impressed with your patience and wisdom. You've been my secret hero, looking so cute in that new pic. And now, with you being honest with us about how maintenance is a struggle, it will help us stop feeling someday we can eat again. No we can't. But that doesn't mean we can't enjoy food. We were working hard in the house, and I had gotten hungry, really actually physically hungry...you know...like God made us to do. (I hesitate to use the word "normal" but I have actually known a few people who didn't eat until they were hungry... that strikes me as odd because I've always eaten to keep from getting hungry...like hunger will cause something bad to happen. ). Gena & Chris, my other addiction that I could not have just one of, is cigarettes. Nevermind that they gave me copd. To this day if I could I'd be smoking. I loved smoking. I wasn't fat when I was smoking (mostly). So believe me I know when a person says one drink is too many and a thousand isn't enough, I relate.. I guess that's why dealing with my emotions through use of the Steps is the only thing that will keep me out of the nut house... I had such a meltdown in the hospital during an appendectomy last year, now Medicare pays for my therapist. See how God works? All things indeed do work together for the good.... My reality is that I have so much to be grateful for I need to spend part of each day on my face... but I keep thinking it's too hard to get off the floor.. Laura Lee, our posts crossed, so I opened this back up to say how thrilled I am for you that you went out and enjoyed life! You fit into the seat with room to spare! It takes another food addict to appreciate that! Thanks so much.... BBL,. Lin.. |
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I still enjoy food. L&G style eating is very satisfying & I don't feel particularly deprived but once in awhile. Sometimes I'll be in a food scenario & the desire to go wild hits me like a brick in the face. That doesn't mean I have to do it though. Every day I feel capable of staying OP for another day. And that's how I take it, one day at a time.
Staying honest with myself is the biggest key to success. Thank you for your kind words Lin, I really appreciate it. I've been devoted to the blogs since day 1 of my journey & now I'm enjoying this thread very much. I hope we keep it up.. Laura, how WONDERFUL to be able to fit comfortably in a seat! Like Lin said, only another person who walks in our shoes can fully appreciate your joy. Keep up the hard work, you are SO worth it! If you don't have time for OA meetings, you can always listen to the phone meetings or check out the online website.. If we intend to keep this group going, I'd like to post one of the For Today blurbs every morning. They are great motivational & inspirational thoughts that we can surely all benefit from. Food for thought with NO calories...gotta love THAT!. Let me know what you think. I can start tomorrow morning with the March 2nd reading.. Again, these are not MY words, they come from the OA daily reader.. Hugs. Chris.. |
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Good morning QA friends. I can't wait to get in on this mornings phonecall. I wii catch up on the postings later!!!..
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Hi everyone - wow, this thread took off over the weekend! I'm so glad to see everyone here!.
Lin, the 90 day meetings are something that were not around when I was in OA the last time. Those who subscribe to that plan eat 3 weighed and measured meals a day, nothing in between, no sugar & no flour. Some eat no wheat, no chewing gum, or artificial sweeteners. The meeting I go to is a 90 day meeting but I do not necessarily subscribe to that food plan. In order to be a speaker you have to follow that abstinence plan for 90 days. For right now, Medifast is my food plan. I firmly believe it is different for each person, and as long as I'm honest about it, that is ok.. The "For Today" book and the "Voices of Recovery" book are how I start my mornings. I read both of these meditation books first thing in the morning and I say the 3rd step prayer:. "God, today is a new day for me and with You it can be a day of abstinence. With You I can handle anything. I ask for Your protection in case some time during the day the desire to eat compulsively becomes stronger than my desire to abstain. I ask for Your protection against anyone or anything that will interfere with my abstinence. I know that I am powerless over food and that my life can become unmanageable again. I know that You can relieve my compulsion and restore me to sanity. I turn my will and my life over to you. God I need you.. Thank you all so much for sharing, it is such a comfort to know that there are others out there traveling the same road. I'm looking forward to getting to know all of you better.. Have a wonderful on plan day!.. |
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Bumping this to give folks a chance to find it..
Relying on Higher Power is making Medifast much easier than struggling on my own. I think in some cases we use the group as higher power, and if that works, and it did for a long time, it's fine. But I'm in the trenches now, where my inability to deal with unpleasant feelings will defeat me, or it won't.. Grief and other traumatic emotions COMPEL food for soothing. Like alcoholics use alcohol, I use food. Any variation from Medifast is destructive to me because it means I'm playing mind games and being dishonest.. Trying to beat the system is the surest way to fail.. Just for today. I can't deal with this.. He can.. I think I'll let Him.. Lin.. |
