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First of all Need Drink Medifast recipes to Overlap ingredients? Hoping for any answer or 2. Another question... I guess today is the day for name calling. AliciaMac had a run in with an old jerk in a parking lot and my daughter had a run in with a young jerk on her.

School.

Bus..

After returning from.

School.

Today, my 16 year old daughter told me that her sister, my 14 year old daughter, had been mean to a boy on the bus and had thrown his hat out the window. When I questioned my younger daughter about what had happened and why she would do something like that she said that she had to: that she was sticking up for me..

Apparently, the boy, who has visited our home several times and I know well, was calling me a fat, lazy, disgusting, and other names I won't put into print. I was astonished. I have never been anything but kind to this boy. I'm sure he was just doing this in a childish effort to hurt my daughter but it still broke my heart. Mostly because of the realization that my size adversely affects my daughters in yet another way. I couldn't even be mad at the boy I was just so mad at myself..

In her defense of me she told him to "just wait! My mom is having.

Surgery.

And she will be skinny in a year!" He replied that sometimes they accidentally take out a kidney during these surgeries and that he "hoped" the doctors didn't do that to me..

Luckily she's smart enough to know that he is full of it and that no one will be removing my kidney. But as she was telling me this I felt so small and ashamed..

We live in a small rural area of Hawaii where you inevitably run into somebody you know everywhere you go. When I am out with my daughters I sometimes worry that they are embarrassed by me when we run into their friends. Especially when it's someone I am meeting for the first time. Sometimes I notice a shocked look on their friends face and I think to myself that it's probably because of how fat I am..

What's interesting is that most of it is in my head. My daughters aren't ashamed of me. They say they are proud of me. They are always anxious to introduce me as their mom. And, what you don't know is that my girls are adopted and are a different race that I am so the look of shock I sometimes see on their friends face when meeting me for the first time is most likely in regards to the fact that they didn't expect to see a white woman being introduced as their black friends mom..

Anyhow, I am ready to be rid of this fat and be proud of my appearance but I am noticing that the conversations I have in my head about myself need to change too. How can I teach my daughters to love their own bodies and not to judge others by their outward appearance when I don't love MY own body and judge my own appearance so harshly. So, as of right now, I am done with those negative conversations about myself! I'm not going to listen to them any more. I am going to have new conversations about all that I love about myself..

The truth is that, for now anyhow, I am a fat woman, and, I am also a beautiful woman. Maybe everyone cannot see past my size but those who matter to me can. And, for everyone else...I 'm with Steve...let's just back the heck over them! :-))).

Here's to all of us beautiful women...and men!!! Fat, skinny, pre-op, post-op...WE ROCK!..

asked May 09 at 11:47

Brooklyn
's gravatar image

Brooklyn
109


Hmm... I need to find out myself. I don't know what is the right answer. I'll do some research in Google and get back to you if I discover an anything. You should email the people at Medifast as they probably know..

answered May 09 at 12:48

Jackson's gravatar image

Jackson
4055

After.

Reading.

Your story I thought I had a lost twin my mom forgot to tell me about, I am having an WOW moment right now!!!!, you have took my thoughts and verbalized them. feel the same way trying to think poss thoughts..

I have good days and bad days, but my sister always tells me people are going to treat you according to how you treat yourself!!!!!!. hang in there. I am Praying for you but it sounds like you CAN handle this!!!!!!!.

And I am loven those girls of yours ( WAY TO STICK UP FOR MOM) it's funny how when we do not see our beauty our kids always do!!!!!!!..

answered May 09 at 13:01

Viviana
's gravatar image

Viviana
4571

Your girls sound strong and self-confident!.

Hope.

That little turd on the bus had to explain to his mom what happened to his hat!.

I know what you mean about the negative crap we say to ourselves. I've been assuming that people are startled at my weight when they first meet me. This year I also started to wonder if my kids were ashamed to be seen in public with me..

Finally starting to realize I am my worst critic. Boy, it's a hard habit to break!.

Congratulations to you for taking control of your health and for raising strong girls!!..

answered May 09 at 13:54

Alberto's gravatar image

Alberto
1253

@SUNSETYELLOW:.

I do worry about how people will interact with me once I loose weight. Some people have never known me any other way..

I am embarrassed to admit it but when my mom lost 85 pounds and was a new woman like a teenager again, always out with her friends and active and loving life I didn't react well to it at all. It brought up so many issues for me. I thought it was so unfair that she was thin and I was still fat. It caused a huge strain on our relationship all my own issues of course but at the time I couldn't or didn't want to see that..

I also have this weird guilt thing about having something others I love do not have. I was.

Talking.

To my little sister the other day, telling her about my choice to have.

Surgery.

, and I started to feel so guilty. She is not huge like me, but her weight fluctuates between like a size 8 and a size 16. I have never been thinner than her though..

While we were.

Talking.

I realized that one day, post-op, I may end up smaller than her. I was flooded with guilt. Like it was selfish for me to be thin if she wasn't or something. I don't really know how to explain it. Probably sounds silly to you, idk?.

@peactome:.

OMG! I have always wanted to be a twin! :-)).

@Dixie05.

It's a terrible feeling isn't it, worrying what people are thinking of you or that someone you care about may be embarrassed by you? You are right though, we are our worst critics I think..

And, about the boy, he was calling me names again today at.

School.

And my daughter got into it again with him, but this time she decided to sock him. Not such a wise choice on her part as it resulted in her suspension for two days, however, it's hard for me to be too mad at her, she was, of course, defending my honor. We had a talk about healthier ways to handle bullies and name callers..

Love you guys! Thanks for all the wonderful support as always!.

-Jenny :-))..

answered May 09 at 14:39

Brody's gravatar image

Brody
2903

Jenny,.

What an awesome post,.

Reading.

It just now brought tears to my eyes. You have touched a common chord in so many of us...I work at controlling my 'self-talk' and being an encouragment to myself, but it's not always easy to quell that other voice....

Thanks for sharing...

answered May 09 at 15:36

Raegan
's gravatar image

Raegan
4869

Awesome post. I know how you feel, I've been called names and worse to myself and friends. I don't have any children but I have had friends that have had to hear about how fat and lazy and gross I am. It sucks alot but if people have to say those things to people they obviously aren't happy with themselves..

answered May 09 at 17:12

Gianna
's gravatar image

Gianna
1671

You are a beautiful woman, and you must also be a fabulous mom for your two daughters to be so loving and loyal to you. I have three statements posted in my kitchen, and they may also help you. They are:.

Trust yourself..

Maintain a gentle mind..

Honor your body..

Hope.

That helps. Take care. (BTW, glad you've joined our group.)..

answered May 09 at 17:27

Braxton's gravatar image

Braxton
1622

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